Are you ready to wake up to the importance of self-care?
The time has come to stop sabotaging your wellbeing and to start paying attention to (and giving time to) self-care.
How you treat yourself shows others how to treat you… Let me repeat that ‘How you treat yourself shows others how to treat you‘.
If you are failing to put yourself on your to do list, if you are wearing yourself out running around doing everything & being everything for everybody else, don’t be surprised when your health fails you and be even less surprised when the people you are running around for begin to ‘expect’ you to do all the things you do for them.
Sadly, it doesn’t take long for appreciation to shift to expectation and before you know it, that to do list expands with others needs whilst your own get put on the back burner, slowly fading away into insignificance.
It can happen so slowly you barely realise it is happening at all. You go through subtle shifts of energy loss, to tiredness, a little stress, then a whole lot more before the resentment and frustration show up. Then finally, your health takes a dive and you wonder how you got there.
Superwoman syndrome is real, and it could be happening to you or someone you know.
So how do you begin to recognise the patterns that reinforce the story that everyone and everything must come before you? What does it take to create a supportive healthy mindset to help you shift into self-care without the burden of guilt?
- Think Back To Being Raised
As you think back to your childhood, what were you told about being a girl/woman? If you had male siblings, were they treated differently and were you aware of those differences? If you were in a two-parent household, did you see different responsibilities for your mother from your father? All these things influence and create an imprint for your behaviour.
- Notice Your Cultural Expectations
What does your culture expect of you? Some cultures dictate the woman’s role as one where she needs to keep the family in order, where she delivers emotionally to others. Her ‘place’ is to serve those in her life as a priority. Quite often in these cultural situations the male is deemed the earner. As we look at today though, more women work, run their own businesses, help in the community, and have a family. With all of these expanding duties, the change in who does what requires review and updating.
- Recognise Societal & Institutional Expectations
What does society tell women about women? Every environment tells a story about how you are expected to behave and how important you are (or are not). And even though things have and are still changing, there is still a sense of ‘women should know their place’; based on old rules written by old men. Women who do not conform to the expectations are then name called, often in derogatory ways while their male counterparts, who act the same, are viewed as strong leaders.
- Understand How You Interpret Self-Care; Is It Being Selfish?
If you believe self-care is selfish, it is possible steps 1-3 are playing out in your life to some degree, causing you to self-sabotage your well-being. Once you see self-care as a necessity, how you think, feel and behave shifts, enabling you to return to a place of self-appreciation & self-love. This, in turn, affects how those around you see you and treat you. It is not about others being less important, it is about knowing you serve best and most meaningfully when you are at your best… And that requires you to put you first!
- Does The Thought Of Self-Care Make You Feel Guilty?
If anything will kill your desire to put self-care on the top of your to-do-list, guilt will. You must question the guilt, where is it coming from? Is it because of steps 1-3, is it a lack of belief that you need self-care? Is it that you don’t think you deserve to take the time for self? Or are you caught up in Superwoman Syndrome? Whichever one, self-esteem and self-confidence are likely to be root causes.
- Is Your Energy Tank Running On Empty?
Your true energy value is found once stress is subtracted… It’s important to spend time daily refuelling yourself. Are you focusing on accessing your optimal energy or are you increasing the quantity of stress in your life? The more stress you are carrying, the less space for the pure energy from source. Stress lowers your vibration and as your vibration lowers, you attract less of what you want into your life. Awareness & acknowledgement of the importance of self-care are required.
Are you someone who shelves self-care or feels guilty about taking time for self? Where do you think it comes those thoughts and feelings come from? And what are you willing to do about it if anything? I would love to know…
Self-care is the best care!